We all have bad days. You know, those days where you get to the curb just in time to miss your bus and get splashed with mud by a speeding cab when you’re already late for a super-critical appointment that has the power to change your life FOREVER. Bad days are an unavoidable fact of life. These are the days when Fate gets a good laugh at our expense.
These are also not the days that have anything to do with what I’m talking about today.
Instead, I’m talking about when the Universe brings about a very specific set of dire events designed to destroy your life and shatter every fiber of hope and joy in your being. I’m talking about illness and death, divorce and job loss. I’m talking about the perfect convergence of terrible life events that the Negativity Beast only wishes it could claim credit for orchestrating.
I’m talking about when the Universe is out to get us and what we can do to retain our sanity.
Understanding the difference between the Negativity Beast and the Universe
Generally, it’s pretty obvious that the Negativity Beast is the soft, annoying voice in our heads trying to melt the smile right off our face. NB has loads of tools at its disposal. These weapons include:
The list is quite literally endless. The common thread, however, is that the Negativity Beast is always using your mind against you. Sure, there may be outside forces you react to, but NB always finds a way to use those forces to its benefit.
The Universe is a different story. A very different story.
Unless you’re mentally ill and doing the bidding of the Negativity Beast, it doesn’t have the power to kill anyone. The Universe does. It isn’t that the Universe is particularly mean-spirited or cruel, just that there’s a natural order to things, a balance. We all die, sooner or later. People lose their jobs. Loved ones drift apart. Natural disasters occur.
In a way, the Universe is the ultimate creator of issues we didn’t create and can’t control.
Facing the lie we all seem to believe
You know how we all hear people tell us to put on a brave face and stay positive? How things will all be okay if we just smile more?
It doesn’t work.
The lie too many of us believe is that we have to stay positive when the Universe is seemingly out to get us. We trick ourselves into believing that something’s wrong with us if we can’t get over a tragedy and move on. So, we force ourselves to “do better” at being positive and then beat ourselves up once we fail at the task.
That, my friends, sucks. That’s also the work of the Negativity Beast. It didn’t create the tragedies in your life, but it sure as sunshine plans to use it to destroy you and any positive outlook you once held dear.
As I mentioned last week, Fate makes us suffer. What I didn’t expand on at the time was the fact we didn’t have to like it.
Beating the lie and coping with life
Really, my point in writing about this today is to make you understand that it’s okay not to be sunny and positive each and every moment of your life – especially when seriously bad stuff is going on in your world. But, since it’s Tuesday, I still have to give you something tangible you can work through to cope when you’re on the Universe’s hit list. So, I guess I will
I refuse to teach anyone to plaster on a fake smile and pretend their way through the day. No, that’s not right. Instead, let’s learn how to uncover the lie and move from there.
- Assess what’s upsetting you
- Get to the root of the issue, not the superficial reason that’s easier to face
- Determine if it’s the Universe or the Negativity Beast
- If your life is changing in a drastic and fundamental way, the Universe is the odds on favorite
- Select the length of time you’re willing to let this alter your mood
- The Universe may have struck first, but you still get ultimate control over your reaction.
I should add one caveat to this. If you’re dealing with a Universe event and you’ve become so negative that you’re sick of yourself or the people in your life are jumping ship, it’s time to make a change. At that point, I’d still say plastering a smile on your face isn’t the way to go, but neither is wallowing in self-pity or grief to the point of self-destruction. If you have a support network, now’s the time to reach out to them and allow them to show you the silver lining on your storm clouds.
And if you don’t have a support network…you do now, through The Positive Piper. This website is here, the Facebook Community is here and I’m here. You don’t have to be alone when the Universe is out to get you unless you just want to be.
I truly mean that.
Now, how do you cope when the Universe is out to get you? My personal method is convoluted and usually involves going catatonic for a bit…and a few pints of ice cream.
© 2011, Jen Whitten. All rights reserved. Using content from The Positive Piper without permission will cause the Negativity Beast to attack. BEWARE!